Monday, 30 March 2015


Dig right in..

1.  Your mum comes over from your country home to say hello to you in the city for a few days & she promptly sits on your lap right after greeting your mum ( she fails the familiar cue test to excuse son & mum )
where should she go? how about the porch, verandah, kitchen or take a walk ?

2. She comes to say hi after church on sunday, cooks, do the dishes & leaves out your sister & her friend's plate. ( they also came on a visit)

3. She insists on taking some of your calls ( particularly the numbers that are not stored on your device )

4. She scrolls through your Facebook friend's list & even helps you
unfriend & block a few pretty damsels.

5. She gets to your house, complains around, tidy up for you, do some laundry, visits the grocery store etc... and does more fussing..
brother, wahalaaaa (problems) you,ve gat to watch that Eve's daughter.
besides, I thought a lady is not supposed to do laundry, cooking etc... for the guy when are both not married ?
what if he has a washing machine? ahh, did you think I meant hand laundrying before? so, some sis wash jeans & dirty boXKers" with their hands before?
woooo, love is trully blind folded !

6. She already asking you if you gonna give her "cunnilingus" when you both get married.... Oh boy !!!  pray you are up to that task ( thought she is a virgin) or technical one. She should definitely not be active sexually before marriage.
Ohhh, if both of you are then its another different story entirely.
(this post is to enlighten my bros out there, hence... )

Guys you getting my drift...

7. She directly demands for sex from you & chides you when you are like
"but, we are not supposed to now"
watch it brother...

8. She already owes a lot of debt and this debts could have been avoided.
Am talking about money she borrowed to go spend vacation in Dubai whilst you are trying to raise some money to register your business name.. lol chaiiiii . see me see wahala.
you don enter one chance Oooo

9. She insists you both see her pastor somewhere in the mountainous regions of the South-West where they "PRESCRIBED" a 40 days dry fasting for you both as you prepare towards your wedding.
You are not allowed to shake, see each other alone unless the pastor is there or even take a major step without finding out from her spiritualist.
Sir, Sir , hmmmm   Sirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....
ee ba esee yin so roooo (communicate with your proverbial legs with which you entered the relationship.

10. She thinks facebook is demonic !!!

stay tuned for more !!!

Now, pls dont get me wrong.
Am not saying you should not marry your fiancee if she has the above qualities or more than few of them. Am just pulling you by the collar as a friend to get a 2nd and many other 2nd opinions just before you say "I DO"

Cheerio cheers with perry winkles on it !!!


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